Advice on Adult Bullying: Spot the Types, Know the Effects & 5 Ways To Help - Sun and Planets Spirituality AYINRIN
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In a world where the dialogue around bullying is often centered on children and schools, the reality of adult bullying remains a less-discussed—yet—equally critical issue.
Whether you’re experiencing bullying at work, amongst family, or within friend groups, it all hits the same and can be psychologically damaging.
The hard part is that, as adults, this isn’t entirely something we expect from other adults. Yet, here's a friendly reminder: We can’t control others, but we can control ourselves.
- At the same time, how do you deal with it?
- Are you facing adult bullying in some shape or form?
- How can you protect your mental well-being?
Below, we dig into the signs of adult bullying, examples, effects, and, most importantly, how you can cope and handle it.
Signs of Adult Bullying
While there are many different definitions of adult bullying, technically, it’s when a person regularly makes you feel humiliated, oppressed, or belittled.
At the same time, adult bullying and harassment are slightly different; harassment is when the bullying behavior is targeted toward someone specifically for their race, color, religion, sex, disability, age, or nationality.
There are also many different types of adult bullies.
These include the following.
The Verbal Bully
They will use words with the intent to harm you, such as:
- shaming you
- making harsh criticisms
- using threats
- or using insults
Sometimes, certain language used may be homophobic, sexist, or racist.
The Physical Bully
The physical bully’s actions range from break objects, threatening to hit or punch, or throwing things to violent acts.
The Passive-Aggressive Bully
This type of bully is probably the hardest to spot since they bully indirectly.
For instance, they may spread gossip, make hurtful and mean jokes, or use sarcasm to belittle others. Most often, these individuals won’t admit when they’ve done anything wrong.
The Tangible-Material Bully
These bullies are individuals in position of power, such as your boss or manager.
However, they use this power exert control over others. They can further be individuals given authority over one’s finances but they use this financial control to limit the other person and for their own personal gains.
The Cyber Bully
In modern times, this is becoming a bigger and bigger problem.
People can easily hide behind a screen, sending harassing emails, texts, messages, and more. They may also engage in cyberstalking.
In a world where the dialogue around bullying is often centered on children and schools, the reality of adult bullying remains a less-discussed—yet—equally critical issue.
Whether you’re experiencing bullying at work, amongst family, or within friend groups, it all hits the same and can be psychologically damaging.
The hard part is that, as adults, this isn’t entirely something we expect from other adults. Yet, here's a friendly reminder: We can’t control others, but we can control ourselves.
- At the same time, how do you deal with it?
- Are you facing adult bullying in some shape or form?
- How can you protect your mental well-being?
Below, we dig into the signs of adult bullying, examples, effects, and, most importantly, how you can cope and handle it.
Signs of Adult Bullying
While there are many different definitions of adult bullying, technically, it’s when a person regularly makes you feel humiliated, oppressed, or belittled.
At the same time, adult bullying and harassment are slightly different; harassment is when the bullying behavior is targeted toward someone specifically for their race, color, religion, sex, disability, age, or nationality.
There are also many different types of adult bullies.
These include the following.
The Verbal Bully
They will use words with the intent to harm you, such as:
- shaming you
- making harsh criticisms
- using threats
- or using insults
Sometimes, certain language used may be homophobic, sexist, or racist.
The Physical Bully
The physical bully’s actions range from break objects, threatening to hit or punch, or throwing things to violent acts.
The Passive-Aggressive Bully
This type of bully is probably the hardest to spot since they bully indirectly.
For instance, they may spread gossip, make hurtful and mean jokes, or use sarcasm to belittle others. Most often, these individuals won’t admit when they’ve done anything wrong.
Related Article: 6 Manipulation Styles You Need to Know So You Can Protect Yourself
The Tangible-Material Bully
These bullies are individuals in position of power, such as your boss or manager.
However, they use this power exert control over others. They can further be individuals given authority over one’s finances but they use this financial control to limit the other person and for their own personal gains.
The Cyber Bully
In modern times, this is becoming a bigger and bigger problem.
People can easily hide behind a screen, sending harassing emails, texts, messages, and more. They may also engage in cyberstalking.
Related Article: Mobbing: 8 Ways to Identify Psychological Harassment at Work & Strategies to Help
Effects of Adult Bullying
Bullying can impact the victim in many different ways. These include:
Impacts on Mental Health
Victims may experience increased anxiety, depression, and stress.
The constant feeling of being targeted can lead to a state of hyper-vigilance, where the individual is always on edge, anticipating negative interactions. This can exacerbate or lead to mental health disorders.
Impact on Physical Health
Surprisingly, the stress associated with being bullied can manifest physically.
Symptoms can include headaches, muscle tension, sleep disturbances, and a weakened immune system. In some cases, chronic stress can contribute to more serious health issues like heart disease and hypertension.
Reduced Self-Esteem and Confidence
Victims often start questioning their worth and abilities, which can affect their personal and professional lives. This loss of confidence can lead to a withdrawal from social situations and a reluctance to take on new challenges or opportunities.
Decreased Work Performance
In the workplace, bullying can lead to decreased productivity and engagement. Victims might find it hard to concentrate, make decisions, or feel motivated. It can also lead to increased absenteeism as individuals may try to avoid the bullying environment.
Impacted Relationships and Social Life
Bullying can strain personal and professional relationships. Victims might become isolated, as they may withdraw from social interactions to avoid potential bullying situations. This isolation can lead to a lack of support when it's most needed.
In extreme cases of bullying, it can lead to Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). This is especially true if the bullying continues for a lengthy amount of time or if the bullying occurs in what is supposed to be a safe and trusting relationship, such as with a partner, family member, or friend.
How to Deal With Adult Bullying
Luckily, you don’t have to merely let the bully carry on.
While ignoring them and keeping your distance can often go a long way, this isn’t always possible.
Thus, you can also:
1. Set Boundaries
Boundaries are lines we draw for ourselves. They are where another person ends and we begin. For example, if we decide we won’t tolerate someone talking to us a certain way, our boundary can be that we walk away or we politely disengage.
2. Document the Bullying
This is particularly important if it escalates and if it’s occurring in the workplace as documentation allows you to have something to bring to human resources. In some cases, they may be needed to file a formal compliant or even a police report.
3. Focus on What You Can Control
Which is you! You don’t have to react. You can walk away. By understanding and knowing that we can’t control another person’s behavior and focusing on what we can do to avoid the situation, we can feel that much stronger and avoid damage to our self-esteem.
Additionally, it’s best you don’t react. Responding while maintaining your composure or ignoring it, if you can’t stay composed, is best.
4. Create Distance
Don’t make plans with that “friend” anymore. Or ask human resources if you can move offices or desks or departments. Limited interactions with a bully can prevent them from having an impact on your life and your feelings.
5. Seek Professional Help
Don’t shy away from talking to others who love and care about you. At the same time, if you feel your mental heath has been impacted, reach out to a pro. They can help you develop healthy ways to cope and handle it that are appropriate for your specific situation.
Rising Above Adult Bullying: Final Thoughts…
Facing adult bullying is a challenging journey that requires courage, resilience, and a proactive approach.
It's crucial to recognize that you are not alone and that the problem lies with the bully, not with you.
By documenting incidents, setting firm boundaries, and seeking support from friends, professionals, or workplace resources, you can navigate this difficult terrain.
Remember, prioritizing your mental and physical well-being is paramount. Engaging in self-care, educating yourself about your rights, and possibly altering your environment are all steps towards regaining control and peace in your life.
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