9 Simple Statements With the Power to Transform Your Relationships - Sun and Planets Spirituality AYINRIN
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Author:His Magnificence the Crown, Kabiesi Ebo Afin! Oloja Elejio Oba Olofin Pele Joshua Obasa De Medici Osangangan Broadaylight.
Let’s be honest; Long-term relationships are tough.
And by “tough,” I mean they require work, time, and effort for a successful life partnership. Sure, there are couples that might seamlessly fit together. But for the rest of us, we often have to accept our partner’s faults (or look at them in a new light) and overcome more than a few hurdles to make it work.
So, if you’re at your wit's end and thinking that your current relationship might not be working out, well, you have the power to change your relationship. Sometimes, all it takes is a change in our perspective or behavior, which may fuel positive changes in our partner or allows us to see them in a new light.
How Can I Change My Relationship in Life?
With all the above in mind, here are a few statements that might actually change the way you think about your relationship or how you approach it.
Take what you need here, and leave what you don’t.
1. “It’s okay to agree to disagree.”
We are different people. Let’s learn to accept this. Sometimes, we won’t agree, and that’s okay.
Inevitably, if it’s something major, like having children, this could pose some issues. However, if it’s something minor, such as whether a fine dining set is nice or not, it might be best just to move on and find one you both like rather than arguing about it.
The fact that you don’t share the same preferences all the time can also be a proven strength in a relationship, as you can both offer differing viewpoints, expanding each other’s perspectives on the world and life.
2. “We can’t change others, but we can change ourselves.”
Not that we need to.
However, if you’re nitpicking your partner or the name of the game is blame in your relationship, it’s time to focus less on each other and more on ourselves. What can we do to change things? What is within our control?
Focusing on ourselves leads to personal self-growth and can help us learn to take responsibility for our part in a fight or issue. This can help us better ourselves, which can make is unstoppable in all aspects of life.
3. “Never make a life-altering decision based on sudden and intense feelings.”
In the midst of the fight, we may want to shout and threaten the end of the relationship.
Yet, this is actually kind of abusive, especially if we don’t intend to follow through. Plus, once our emotions die down, we might not actually feel this way.
Instead, leave big decisions to a time when you are emotionally calm and can think clearly about the decision ahead of you. This can allow you to make them confidently.
4. “Most people need love and acceptance more than they need advice.”
Sometimes, we all just need someone to listen.
We don’t need input, opinions, or advice; We just need to feel validated and accepted. This relates back to our need for belonging. As humans, this is an innate need that helps us feel safe and secure in our life.
When your partner is having a bad day, instead of hopping on the advice bandwagon, try stepping forward with a compassionate ear, love, and acceptance. We all need this once and a while! This can break down walls and also offer a significant connection between us and our partner.
5. “We need to love ourselves first.”
Getting into a relationship where we don’t truly accept and love ourselves can set us up to be dependent (and, I hate to say it, clingy).
We end up turning to our partner for validation, acceptance, and love. Yet, one person can never give us everything we seek. We need to learn to give ourselves what we need first and to love ourselves for all that we are.
In turn, this can foster a healthy relationship from the get-go, allowing us to know when we need to put ourselves first, what our boundaries are, and what we are willing to do or not do.
6. “Be together for your own reasons, not because of external pressure.”
When it comes to making changes in your relationship, this only really works if both of you absolutely want to be there.
If you’re together because of your friend group or external pressures, like solely because of finances or children, this can set you up for misery.
Ultimately, you need to make this decision for yourself by yourself, as does your partner.
7. “Quit mind-reading.”
Assumptions and made-up stories in our heads can sometimes be far from reality.
Instead, let’s avoid assuming and ask questions to understand. This can help your partner feel understood, as well as foster a deeper understanding and connection between the two of you.
8. “You won’t ‘find’ the time; You need to make it.”
When it comes to “working” on your relationship or having “discussions” about it, the right time likely won’t just fall into your lap.
Instead, it’s imperative that you make the time and schedule it into the calendar. This is how we make strides forward in all aspects of life, including when it comes to seeing a change in our relationships.
9. “Keep dating each other.”
Many couples fall into a regular rhythm of living life side-by-side but not truly experiencing life together.
Remember, as time goes on, to still date one another. Plan experiences. Plan time together. Nurture the friendship that started it all. This is essential to keep the love alive!
Is It Possible to Change Your Relationship?
Yes! With consistent effort, love, and time, you can change your relationship. It’s also important to remember that relationships go through ebbs and flows. There will be bad and good times.
We just have to learn to ride that wave together rather than letting it tear us apart.
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