MARRIAGE IN AFRICAN IFA CULTURE AND SPIRITUALITY BY BABALAWO OBANIFA – Obanifa extreme Documentaries
In this current work, Babalawo
Obanifa will examine institution of marriage from cultural and theological
perspective. The work is meant to serve as a practicing guideline and reference
to consult when handling matter related to marriage.
What is Marriage?
Ordinarily marriage definition
ought to just simply mean the union between a man and woman to live and relate
together as husband and wife. But the spate of civilization and advancement in human
sociology have change this perspective. As a result, the simple definition given
above can no longer suffice. So, in this work my definition of marriage will be
in two broad perspectives, which are; secular perspective definition of marriage
and theological cum cultural perspective definition of marriage. It is
instructive for the reader to note that, at least for the purpose of this work,
that ,it is the definition of marriage that I will give under theological cum
cultural perspective that is valid and acceptable morally and spiritual as definition
of marriage for religion or cultural practice. While any secular definitions of
marriage given in this work under secular perspective is made available there
for purpose of comparison and education purpose. Let examine the definition of
marriage from the two perspective in turn.
Definition of Marriage
from Secular Perspective
According
to https://www.britannica.com/topic/marriage
,‘Marriage, is a legally and socially sanctioned union, usually between
a man and a woman,
that is regulated by laws, rules, customs, beliefs, and attitudes that
prescribe the rights and duties of the partners and accords status to their
offspring (if any). The universality of marriage within different societies and
cultures is
attributed to the many basic social and personal functions for which it
provides structure, such as sexual gratification and regulation, division of labour
between the sexes, economic production and consumption,
and satisfaction of personal needs for affection, status, and companionship.
Perhaps its strongest function concerns procreation, the care of children and
their education and socialization, and
regulation of lines of descent. Through the ages, marriages have taken a great
number of forms. (See exchange marriage;
group marriage; polyandry; polygamy; tree marriage. See
also common-law
marriage.)’’
Marriage
is defined differently, and by different entities, based on cultural,
religious, and personal factors.
A
commonly accepted and encompassing definition of marriage is the following:
a formal union and social and legal contract between two individuals that
unites their lives legally, economically, and emotionally. The contractual
marriage agreement usually implies that the couple has legal obligations to
each other throughout their lives or until they decide to divorce. Being
married also gives legitimacy to sexual relations within the marriage.
Traditionally, marriage is often viewed as having a key role in the
preservation of morals and civilization.
https://www.thespruce.com/definition-of-marriage-2303011
concisely give other definitions of marriage thus;
‘There
are other definitions of marriage as defined by these well-known resources:
Merriam-Webster
1.
a: the state of being united to a person of the opposite
sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized
by law (2): the state of being united to a person of the same sex in
a relationship like that of a traditional marriage [same-sex marriage] b: the
mutual relation of married persons [wedlock] c: the
institution whereby individuals are joined in a marriage
2.
an act of marrying or the
rite by which the married status is effected; especially: the
wedding ceremony and attendant festivities or formalities
Dictionary.com
1.
Any of the diverse forms of interpersonal union established in various parts of the world
to form a familial bond that is recognized legally, religiously, or socially, granting the
participating partners mutual conjugal rights and responsibilities and including, for
example,opposite-sex marriage, same-sex marriage, plural marriage,
and arranged marriage.
2.
Also called opposite-sex marriage.
The form of this institution under which a man and a woman have established
their decision to live as husband and wife by legal commitments, religious
ceremonies, etc. See also traditional marriage below
3.
This institution expanded to include
two partners of the same gender as in same-sex marriage
4.
The state, condition or relationship
of being married; wedlock
5.
The legal or religious ceremony that
formalizes the decision of two people to live as a married couple, including
the accompanying social festivities
6.
A relationship in which two people
have pledged themselves to each other in the manner of a husband and wife
without legal sanction
In
a landmark decision in the Obergefill v. Hodges case in June 2015, the
United States Supreme Court held in a 5-4 decision that the fundamental right
to marry is guaranteed to same-sex couples by both the Due Process Clause and
the Equal Protection Clause of the 14th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution.’’
Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia did justice to definition
of marriage in more comprehensive manner
than any other definitions compare all together when it define marriage as ‘ matrimony
or wedlock, a culturally recognized union between people, called spouses, that
establishes rights and obligations between them, as well as between them and
their children, and between them and their in-laws.[1] The
definition of marriage varies around the world, not only between cultures and
between religions, but also throughout the history of any given culture and
religion. Over time, it has expanded and also constricted in terms of who and
what is encompassed. Typically, it is an institution
in which interpersonal relationships, usually sexual, are acknowledged or sanctioned. In
some cultures, marriage is recommended or considered to be compulsory before
pursuing any sexual activity. When defined broadly, marriage is considered a
cultural universal. A marriage ceremony is
called a wedding.
Individuals
may marry for several reasons, including legal, social, libidinal,
emotional, financial, spiritual, and religious purposes. Whom they marry may
be influenced by gender,
socially
determined rules of incest, prescriptive
marriage rules, parental choice and individual desire. In some areas of the
world, arranged marriage, child
marriage, polygamy,
and sometimes forced marriage, may be practiced as a cultural
tradition. Conversely, such practices may be outlawed and penalized in parts of
the world out of concerns regarding the infringement of women's rights or
children's rights (both female and male) or as a result of international
law.[2]
Around the world,
primarily
in developed democracies, there has been a general
trend towards ensuring equal rights for women within marriage and legally
recognizing the marriages of interfaith, interracial, and same-sex
couples. These trends coincide with the broader human rights movement.
Marriage
can be recognized by a state, an organization,
a religious authority, a tribal group, a local community,
or peers. It is often viewed as a contract. When
a marriage is performed and carried out by a government institution in
accordance with the marriage laws of the jurisdiction, without religious
content, it is a civil marriage. Civil marriage recognizes and
creates the rights and obligations intrinsic to matrimony in the eyes of the
state. When a marriage is performed with religious content under the auspices
of a religious institution, it is a religious marriage. Religious marriage recognizes
and creates the rights and obligations intrinsic to matrimony in the eyes of
that religion. Religious marriage is known variously as sacramental
marriage in Catholicism, nikah in Islam, nissuin in Judaism, and various other names in other faith traditions,
each with their own constraints as to what constitutes, and who can enter into,
a valid religious marriage.
Some
countries do not recognize locally performed religious marriage on its own, and
require a separate civil marriage for official purposes. Conversely, civil
marriage does not exist in some countries governed by a religious legal
system, such as Saudi Arabia, where marriages contracted abroad might
not be recognized if they were contracted contrary to Saudi interpretations of Islamic religious law.
In countries governed by a mixed secular-religious legal system, such as Lebanon and Israel, locally
performed civil marriage does not exist within the country, which prevents
interfaith and various other marriages that contradict religious laws from
being entered into in the country; however, civil marriages performed abroad may
be recognized by the state even if they conflict with religious laws. For
example, in the case of recognition of marriage in Israel, this includes recognition of
not only interfaith civil marriages performed abroad, but also overseas
same-sex civil marriages.
The
act of marriage usually creates normative or
legal obligations between the individuals involved, and any offspring they may
produce or adopt. In terms of legal recognition, most sovereign states and
other jurisdictions limit marriage to opposite-sex
couples and a diminishing number of these permit polygyny, child
marriages, and forced marriages. In modern times, a growing number
of countries, primarily developed democracies, have lifted bans on, and have
established legal recognition for, the marriages of interfaith, interracial, and same-sex
couples. In some areas, child marriages and polygamy may occur in spite of
national laws against the practice.
Since
the late twentieth century, major social changes in Western countries have led
to changes in the demographics of marriage, with the age of first marriage
increasing, fewer people marrying, and more couples choosing to cohabit
rather than marry. For example, the number of marriages in Europe decreased by
30% from 1975 to 2005.[3]
Historically,
in most cultures, married women had very few rights of their own, being considered,
along with the family's children, the property of the husband; as
such, they could not own or inherit property, or represent themselves legally
(see, for example, coverture). In Europe, the United States, and other places
in the developed world, beginning in the late 19th
century, marriage has undergone gradual legal changes, aimed at improving the
rights of the wife. These changes included giving wives legal identities of
their own, abolishing the right of husbands to physically discipline their
wives, giving wives property rights, liberalizing divorce laws,
providing wives with reproductive rights of their own, and requiring
a wife's consent
when sexual relations occur. These changes have occurred primarily in Western
countries. In the 21st century, there continue to be controversies regarding
the legal status of married women, legal acceptance of or leniency towards
violence within marriage (especially sexual violence), traditional marriage
customs such as dowry
and bride
price, forced marriage, marriageable
age, and criminalization of consensual behaviors such as premarital
and extramarital sex. ’’
Critical
Appraisal Of the above definitions of Secular Definition of Marriage Institutions
If
you have follow the definitions of marriage given under the sub -topic Secular definition
of marriage above. You will observe that there are some flaws in those definitions
that is in-congruent to African culture and spirituality. And as result of such flaws,
it is not everything that is regarded as marriage in western world, that can be
accepted and regard as marriage in African culture and spirituality. It is as a
result of these defects that make me coined another sub-topic known as theological cum cultural
perspective definition of marriage to state our own correct position of what we
actually deem as definition of marriage in African culture and spirituality.
But before I go into that, I must explain the defects in Secular definitions of
marriage. The defects I notice in such, that are incompatible with our African
culture and spirituality are:
- The definition of marriage to include two partners of the same gender as in same-sex marriage is repugnant to African culture and spirituality.
2.
The definition of marriage to
include tree marriage -that is a situation where an individual has a symbolic marriage
with tree is not deem as acceptable form of marriage in African culture and spirituality.
3.
The definition of marriage to
include polyandry as form of marriage – that is a situation where a woman has
more than one husband at a time is not deem as marriage or regard as valid marriage in Africa culture.
4.
Human-animal marriage( a situation
where human get marry to animals) is also not an acceptable definition of what could be regard as definition
of marriage from the perspective of African culture and spirituality.
5.
Some of the definitions see marriage
as a contracts, while in most African culture marriage is not see as a contract
rather marriage is seeing as lifelong interaction between the parties involve and even the families of
the parties .
All
these five defects I highlighted above are the reason that make me coined the sub-topic theological cum cultural
perspective definition of marriage ,to give an acceptable definition of what is an
institution of marriage from perspective of African culture and spirituality.
Theological cum cultural perspective definition
of marriage
In African culture our definition of marriage
is different from what the western world definition of marriage is. In given definition
of marriage from this perspective. Yoruba Ifa theology will be my divine references
and guide throughout the scope of this work. In Yoruba culture and spirituality
marriage is a lifelong relationship or union between two or more people of opposite
sex to form a union as family and one blood .In Yoruba
culture marriage will be deem to take place when a matured man both in physical
look and intellect bring a mature lady or woman that is ripe for marriage to
his home as Aya /Iyawo. The man in such relationship will be regarded as
Oko while the Woman in such relationship will be regarded as Iyawo(wife).
Aya is deem not to be the actual right word for wife in modern day. But history
have it that Aya which can literately translated to mean something that can depart
from you at any time is the first word
that was first used for wife in Yoruba theology and culture. Some early theologian
has said, it is not actually good to be using the word Aya that Iyawo
is better. The Origin of the word Iyawo itself is another subject of debate.
Some elders were of the view that the word Iyawo is derived from the three
syllables words I-YA-WO(that is someone that is invited from outside to come
and take a look at what is going on inside).In which case, it can be say that a
woman is invited by man among the crowd of woman to come and witness good
things in her husband house (Iyawo). However in Ifa theological circle . They dispute
to that postulations. Most veteran Ifa theologians ,I mean the ones that know
what they are doing, were of the view that the word Iyawo come into existence when
Orunmila visit Iwo city and get marry to Iya (suffering) who is the princess of
Oluwo after the later have suffer him beyond measure. They were of the view that
prior to this period of such occurrence , wife are known as Aya. The Odu Ifa that
give credence to that assertion is Odu Ifa Ogbe Ogunda also known as Ogbeyonu .where Ifa
says:
Inu bibi o da nnkan
Suuru ni baba iwa
Agba to ni suuru
Ohun gbogbo lo ni
Dia fun Orunmila
Baba fe lo fe Iyaa
Tii se omo Oniwoo
Won ni ko seakale ,
ebo ni sise
O rubo
Translation:
Anger does not add up
to anything fruitful
Patience is the father
of (good) character
The superior owns
everything
These were the
statements of the Orunmila Oracle
When he went to look
for the hand of Iya (suffering)
The daughter of Oniwoo
(King of Iwo)
They advised him to
offer ebo
He complied.
Iya(suffering) was the
daughter of Oniwoo Of Iwo. She was good-looking and hard-working woman.She
was also beloved of Oniwoo. Consequently, Oniwoo resolved to take active in hetr
partner option. Oniwoo wanted to make sure that anyone who will marry
his beloved daughter must be patient and not be provoked easily. He put
different tests accordingly for probable applicants. All of them failed.
One day Orunmila decided to embark on divination
trip to Iwo , he want Orunmila then went to consult Ifa to determine
whether or not he would marry Iya the daughter of Oniwoo. He also wanted to
know if the relationship will be fruitful and happy for both of them. The Awo
assured him of the relationship that would be very rewarding for him if he
entered into it. They advised him, however, that he should very patient
and should not be provoked. He was informed that the parents of Iya will put a
lot to the test for him to determine his patience and the level of his patience.
They advised him then to offer sacrifice with a rooster. Palm oil and money. He
complied and departed on his
journey.
When Orunmila arrived
at Oniwoo's palace, he was received warmly and give a room to sleep. Unknown to
Orunmila, the room was a pig sty of Oniwoo.
Above him was where Oniwoo’s chickens were kept. For three days, Orunmila was
kept inside this room without food or water. The room stink intolerably and the chickens defecated
towards Orunmila's body. He never went out, he never aske for food or water,
and he never asked for water to cleanse his body.
On the fourth day, Oniwoo
summoned Orunmila to his palace, when he saw him, he was full of feces and he
was dying terribly. He asked Orunmila if he had enjoyed his stay in his room.
Orunmila replied that the room was like a second palace to him. Orunmila was
asked to move to another room next to the kitchen then. the heat and smoke were
drowning. He stayed inside the room for another three days without food or
drink. On the fourth day he was summoned to the palace in the presence of Oniwoo.
He asked Orunmila if he had enjoyed his stay in his room. Orunmila replied that
the room was very pleasant. Oniwoo asked that Orunmila should be given food for
the first time. He ate the food.
The next room given to
him was filled with rancid water, worms and insects. He could not sleep during
the three days he spent inside the room. They asked him to leave the room. He
had insect bites on his body. When Oniwoo asked him if he had enjoyed his stay
in the room, Orunmila answered affirmatively.
For three months,
Orunmila was moving from one trial to another. He endured everything without
complaint. The next three months were physical tests such as reducing large
trees at the time of registration, clearing large tracts of land and carrying
heavy loads from one place to another. All these he did without complaint.
After this, Oniwoo
summoned Orunmila to meet him to go and take his bath, change into a new dress
presented to him by Oniwoo. Before he returned to the palace court, he
discovered that everywhere and we were all in festive mood. they were all
singing, dancing and celebrating. Oníwòó asked Orunmila to sit besides him. He
did. Oníwòó delivered iya then to him to take house like wife. Onwoo praised
Orunmila's patience, patience and gentle grasp throughout her trials. He then
asked Orunmila to take care of Iya for him, since he had shown that he was
capable of taking good care of a woman.
Orunmila was full of
joy that he had succeeded in the future where some others had failed. He then said of that day to his disciple , that all the women
to marry in a man's house or already those married in the house of a man should be called Iya-Iwo or Iyawo
(suffering of Iwo) He called his new Iya -Iwo .Ere Iwo (the gain for his suffering in the village
of Iwo ).That is how all his disciples began to call their wife Iyawo . From
that day, all the wives were known as Iyawo.
The theologians with this school of thoughts
seem have the the valid point as oppose
to the first one.
In Ifa cosmology. It is believe that
there are four major important things that must be include in the aspirations
and goals of every human beings. They are: longevity of life, wealth, spouse
and children. The two out of these four
goals are closely related .They are spouse and children. These assertions are
explain in Odu Ifa Irete -Ogbe where Ifa says:
Agbon ma nii iwa
Dia fun Orunmila
Baba ji Baba o ri Iregun ire so
Ebo ni won ni ko se
O si gbo ebo nbe
O rubo
Iregun aje , iregun ma ni oo
Agbon ma nii iwa
Ifa je ki n ri iregun ire se o
Iregun aya, iregun ma ni oo
Agbon ma nii iwa
Ifa je ki n ri iregun ire se o
Iregun omo, iregun ma ni oo
Agbon ma nii iwa
Ifa je ki n ri iregun ire se o
Iregun ogbo , iregun ma ni oo
Agbon ma nii iwa
Ifa je ki n ri iregun ire se o
Translation
Agbon ma nii iwa
This was Ifa’s message for Orunmila
When Baba wake up in the morning
without ability to point out to any achievement
He was advised to offer ebo
He complied
The blessing of wealth is good point
of reference for achievement
Agbon ma nii iwa
Ifa let it be possible for me to
have good point of reference of achievements
The blessing of spouse is good point
of reference for achievement
Agbon ma nii iwa
Ifa let it be possible for me to
have good point of reference of achievements
The blessing of children is good point
of reference for achievement
Agbon ma nii iwa
Ifa let it be possible for me to
have good point of reference of achievements
The blessing of longevity is good point of reference for achievement
Agbon ma nii iwa
Ifa let it be possible for me to
have good point of reference of achievements
It can be infer from the excerpt of the
Odu Ifa Irete Ogbe above that having spouse is one of the important life achievement.
It is believe in Yoruba cosmology
that not having a spouse is a defects on the part of anyone concern , hence
there are adage to this effects that “Aponle
ko si fun Oba ti ko ni Olori” that is there is no honor to be accorded to a king that have no queen. Not having
a spouse is deem to be a social defect that should not be kept in hidden. The
person concern is expected to bring it to
the notice of family and friends who can be of help in securing a spouse for
him or her. Hence Yoruba will say “a menu pamo ki ri Iyawo fe” that is those who hide or fail to disclose their lack of spouse to
others, will find it difficult to secure
one” The Odu Ifa Ifa Ose Otura says that when a person did not have a wife or
husband he/she must open up to others people around him /her as regard it .On
this Ifa says:
Ai ni obirin ko see dake lasan
O to ki gbogbo aye o b ani gbo
Dia fun Igba Irunmole ojukotun
A bu fun igba Irunmole ojukosi
Nigba ti won n torun bo wale aye
Ebo ni won ni ki won o se
Won gbo ebo nbe
Won rubo
Translation:
Not having a spouse is not a thing
that one should be silent about
It is things that the whole world needs
to hear about
This is Ifa’s message for Igba Irumonle ojukotun(
two hundred divinities on the right hand)
Same ifa’s message was made for Igba
Irumonle Ojukosi (two hundred divinities on the left hands)
When they are coming from heaven to
earth
They were advise to offer ebo.
It can be infer from the excerpt of
Odu Ifa Ose Otura above that lack of
spouse is not a thing to be silent about.
So from my explanation so far, it
can be infer that when a man and woman
come together as husband and wife with all the incidental and attendance
consequence of such union that is call marriage. Which is known as Igbeyawo
In Yoruba culture. Having know the definition of what a marriage is from my
explanations above. The next thing to
consider is who can be a party to a marriage.
Acceptable parties to marriage in Africa Ifa and Orisa
spirituality
Most of the postulation in this work
are not personal view of Babalawo Obanifa, rather than they are the agelong theological thoughst that is deem acceptable in
African culture as embedded in our spirituality and custom.
1.
The first point to note is that in
African culture and spirituality. the only accepted form of marriage is heterosexual
in nature. That is parties that can come together for purpose of marriage must
be person of opposite sex.
2.
It is also forbidden for human being to get marry
to animals
3.
It is forbidden for human being to
get marry to inanimate objects such as tree, stones or mountains
4.
Marriage is only allowed between
adult of opposite sex who have become mature in both physical look and
intellect to maintain such institutions. Actually I have check all round the
Ifa scriptures that I can have access to,
I have never come across any Odu Ifa that make mention of any age that a woman
or man is ripe for marriage. However culturally in case of a man, when a man
have mature physically to be able to impregnate a woman couple with his ability to be able to provide
the economic need of such woman in term of feeding ,shelter etc. such man will
be deem to be ripe enough for marriage . for example Igbeyawo which is marriage
in Yoruba language can literarily translated to mean lifting a woman /wife off
her feet. It is believe that a man that have strength to carry a woman off her
feet. Should able to use such strength to work and provide for his family. Hence
in our culture , during marriage ceremony the husband is usually ask to carry
the wife. (Igbeyawo) lifting off woman off her feet). In woman, the case is different
what is normally look for is the puberty sign. When a female child attain puberty,
there is change in their looks, the physical size , the shape of their body,
they grow breasts, most importantly they
must have start menstruation. It is believed, but it is not a rule that a woman must have started her
menstruation for at least three years, before she can be deem ready for marriage
market. Though this is not a rule as well. So it can be infer from this explanation
that an under -age person cannot be regarded as a party to a marriage.
5.
Incestuous relationship and endogamy
is not allow in Africa Ifa and Orisa spirituality.no person is allow to marry
the family member or clan.
You
are not allowed to marry member of your immediate or close extended family. You
cannot marry your father, mother, sister, cousin or nephew. For a man you are
not allow to marry your own daughter, even your step daughter if you have one ,is still deem to be your daughter, you are
not allow to marry your step daughter, your blood sisters, or any female related
to by blood. Also any female child that is place under your custody for
protection and care, you cannot abuse the relationship and marry her . Those
parties cannot be deems as a parties to marriage. For woman same norms apply.
You are not allow to marry your son, your step -son if you have one ,is deem as
your son ,you are not allow to marry him. You can not marry your brother or any
man that is closely related to you by blood.
Forbidden parties to marriage In
African Ifa and Orisa spirituality
In African culture and spirituality.
There are some parties that is forbidden as taboo to be marriage with each
other .Observe such parties as explain below:
For Men
1.
You are not allowed to marry your
mother
2.
You are not allowed to marry your daughter
3.
You are not allowed to marry your
sister
4.
You are not allow to marry your
brother wife-Though this is with exception
. In the olden day when a man die, his brother can take over his wife .
in Yoruba land it is called Isupo. Though nobody practices this anymore. And it
is a good thing to stop such practice. To bring our culture to meet up with the
advancement of human civilization and advance sociology Babalawo Obanifa is also one of the proponent
of eradication of such practice.
5.
You can not marry a female that is
related to you by blood, at least if the blood relations can be trace up to
like seven generation.
6.
You can not marry your step- mother
,that is the wife of your father
7.
You can not marry you step daughter
because she is deemed as your daughter
8.
You cannot marry your step sister
because your are deem as family
9.
You cannot marry foster children
because they are deem as your children
You
can not marry your foster mother because she is deem as your mother
10.
You cannot marry your sister-in -law
11.
You can not marry your mother
-in-law
12.
You cannot marry your daughter -in-law
13.
You cannot marry your friend wife
14.
You are not allowed to marry your adopted
daughters
15.
You are not allowed to marry a maid working
for you and living in your house-It will
be deem that you take undue advantage of her
16.
You are not allowed to marry your
male folks-your male counterpart
17.
You are not allowed to marry a woman
that you known she is not ready to be in marriage and discharge duties expected
of her in marriage
18.
You cannot marry the dead
For women
1.
You are not allowed to marry your father
2.
You are not allowed to marry your son
3.
You are not allowed to marry your brother
4.
You are not allowed to marry your sister
husband
5.
You cannot marry any male that is
related to you by blood, at least if the blood relations can be trace up to
like seven generation.
6.
You cannot marry your step father
,that is the husband of your mother
7.
You cannot marry you step son
because he is deem as your son
8.
You cannot marry step brother
because you are deem as family
9.
You cannot marry foster children
because they are deem as your children
10.
You cannot marry your foster father
because he is deem as your father
11.
You cannot marry your brother-in -law
12.
You cannot marry your father -in-law
13.
You cannot marry your son -in-law
14.
You cannot marry your friend husband
15.
You are not allowed to marry your adopted
son
16.
You are not allowed to marry a maid working
for you and living in you’re your house-It will deem that you take undue
advantage of him
17.
You are not allow to marry your fmale
folks
18.
You are not allow to marry a man that
you known he is not ready to be in marriage and discharge duties expected of him
as husband in marriage
19.
You are not allow to marry the dead
Age and marriage
As I explained earlier
if you are following this work by heart. I have never come across any Odu Ifa
that mention age that an individual need to attain before he she can get marry.
But I explained some physical condition that must be present before an individual
can be said to be ripe for marriage.
On the other hand, other factor that I have not mention is
the issue of age difference in marriage. Age difference is not normally an
issue of significance especially when the man is older than the woman. Same thing
apply if the woman is older than the man. In most cases what we do have is men
marry woman below them in age .In this case of woman society do frown at when men marry woman above
them in age . But the answer to this question in affirmative is that age difference
is not a taboo in marriage. As you shall see in the course of my explanation in
this work.
Age group- according to late Pele Olofindipe (my father) of the blessed
memory ,when I aske him about age group. He said people with age difference of
three to four years will still be deem to fall within same age group. That is ,
if someone is five years older than you or you are five years older than someone,
notwithstanding the disparity in number ,culturally under age group
classification ,you are still within same age group. Marriage withing age group is seems to be
valid. And its doe not attract any social opprobrium.
When man is older than the woman -This is when a man (husband) is older than the woman. This
seem to be the most common form of marriage. Men have tendency to naturally go for
woman that is younger than them in age. sometime the gap can be so wide that we can have like 10 to 20 years
age disparity .
Naturally men marry younger women and women prefer to marry older men, in
general. There are many reason that account for this . the first area is child
bearing. Younger women, in general, bear more healthy children. Marrying an
older woman or much older man proved the most detrimental to reproductive success.
We have a man of 80 years ,70 years marrying a girl of 23 or even twenty years
when they know that they can no longer satisfy them sexually. This is wrong.
but notwithstanding no matter the age difference between man and woman so far
that it is man that is older .it does not attracts any social opprobrium.
When a woman is older than man – This is when a woman in marriage(wife) is older than the
man (the husband). In our society in the past there is no custom or scripture that
forbid it, rather than we have ifa scripture that recommend it and approve it
on some occasion ,but it usually attract public opprobrium and criticism . especially
from men. Mostly when it come to area of procreation. With the advancement in human sociology even
though our society has not expressly gives it a nod. But from all indications
of what is happening around us .Ours society have impliedly give it a nod (yes)
mainly because marriage of this nature does
no longer attract opprobrium as it use to some time in the past. There is no
scripture or norm that expressly forbid any marriage of this nature hence you
can not find it on the list of forbidden parties to marriage. We cannot say it is spiritually or culturally prohibited
for man to marry woman that is older than them in age or woman to marry a man that is younger than them in age if that is
option open to them. Though society frown at it but scripturally in African Ifa
spirituality it acceptable . Ifa can even recommend it for some men that they should marry woman that is of advance
age if occasion demand it . the leading
authority on this assertion is found in Odu Ifa
Odi Ogbe also known as Idin gbere . where Ifa expressly told Lajubala to
marry an old woman so that he can get the blessing of children. See what Ifa
have to say in that Odu .On this Ifa says:
Idin -gbere arinako
Dia fun Lajumbala
Ti yoo se oko Arugbo
Ebo ni won ni ko se
Won ni ko fe arugbo
Ko lee raye bi omo
Ki lode to ni o le fe Arugbo
O ba fe arugbo ko le raye bimon
Translation
Idin-gbere Arinako
This was Ifa’ message for Lajumbala
Who shall get marry to old woman
He was advised to offer ebo
Lajumbala you were advised to marry to old woman so you can
get blessed with children
Why did you refuse to get marry to old woman?
You had better get marry to old woman so you can receive blessing
of good children
from the excerpt of the Odi Ogbe above we can see that age difference
in some cases may not be a relevant thing to consider in marriage ,other pertinent
thing to the parties involve may be consider. So it is possible and it acceptable
that in some situation a woman can marry man younger than them in age and a men
can also marry women older than them in age . If situation call for it.
Position on Inter-Tribal and Inter-racial
Marriage
In African culture and spirituality there is no norm that
prohibit inter -tribal or interracial marriage. Every individual is free to exercise
freedom of choice as to whom to marry. You can marry from any tribe or race of
your choice.
Position on Interfaith Marriage
Interfaith
marriage , is marriage
between spouses professing different religions. There may be instances where your spouse did
not profess same religion view you have. There is also no norm prohibiting interfaith
marriage. You are free to marry anybody of your choice even though you did not
share same religion ideology. provided that there agreement that the father who is the husband will have control as regard the religion view that his children
child practice at their tender age
before they become fully fledge to stand on their own to choose whether to
continue with what have been show to them or to toe different part. No wife shall impose
religion view on her husband nor the husband
impose same .
What
is the importance of marriage?
There
are many reason why the institution of marriage is deem important. They are:
Epitome
of divine Love- Marriage is the institution that
teach, that despite the selfish nature of human being, they can still love when it comes to marriage. It is through marriage we learn
to know that human can shun all their sentiment and truly love. Marriage is an
institution that teach divine love.
Procreation-marriage is only important union that bring natural reproduction
of human being.to ensue the continuity of human race we need to procreate and
marriage is the important tool to achieve that.
Companionship- marriage is one of the important tools that human can use
to gain genuine and dedicated companionship especially from opposite sex. Companionship
makes life better. Research had proven that marriage makes people live longer.
You don’t have to go through the highs, lows and in-betweens of life alone. If
you have someone you can go through
these things with ,make life much easier.
Satisfying
of sexual desire- marriage is one of the important
tools that can be use to satisfy sexual desire in morally acceptable ways. It relieves
stress, makes you feel better about yourself. It is only through marriage you
can get sex that devoid of immorality and sin. Sex obtain from marriage come
with peace of mind.
Parenting
Marriage institution is one of the institutions that can bring genuine upbringing of upright children. When a marriage produces a child or receives a child through adoption, it is one of life’s greatest blessings. Roughly 40% of children being raised today are in a home without a father. The effects of that fact are staggering. Father absence causes increases in mental and behavioral disorders as well as criminal activity and substance abuse. But when children are raised in a healthy marriage, they get a front row seat to see and experience the lasting benefits of a strong family.
Types of Marriage
that are acceptable in African culture and spirituality .
In African culture
and spirituality there a majorly two popular form of marriage available, They are Monogamy and Polygamy . These two form of
marriage are acceptable to us. I will explain each in turn
Monogamy
Monogamy is the
practice of marrying or state of being married to one person at a time. the
practice or state of having a sexual relationship with only one partner.
Ifa make it clear that monogamy remain, best type of marriage for any man that
want to have an hitch-free marital life. Although Polygamy is allow and even
celebrated in Yoruba Ifa tradition, some time as a sign of success. But Ifa
make it clear ,that a lot of problems are involve in polygamy because of the nature
and energy that women carry. Ifa make it clear that if a man goes for
polygamy it is accepted but he must be ready to put up with all the
problems that the women involve will bring, yet majority of men in Yoruba
culture ,I inclusive still prefer to go for polygamy despite the foreknowledge
of what is involve. since many Ifa scriptural stanza also approve many wives
and children as omen of achievement. It is instructive to note that Ifa does
not oppose or condemn ,polygamy in any way. But what Ifa just teaches is that
it is more convenient to manage one woman in marriage than two or more. The
issue of backbiting, jealousy, Fights, strives and fear of insecurity which
usually fraught polygamy is what ifa foretell that is likely to be absence in
monogamy.
It is instructive to note
that despite this Ifa scriptural teaches, Yoruba culture is still largely
dominated by polygamous marriage. Because both marriage are accepted in Ifa
tradition. So it is wrong for anybody to think that Yoruba Ifa tradition , in
terms of marriage practice polygamy, it is a matter of choice you chose what
you want The leading Ifa scriptural authority on this position of power
of women, decency of monogamy and problems of polygamy are firmly establish in
Holy Odu Ifa Oyeku Meji. Ifa have this to says:
Ifa ni tititi lori ogbo,
Biiripe biiripe lomi okoo da,
Dida lomi okoo da,
Omi okoo kii yii,
Dia fun Oodua atewonro nife.
Won ni ko rubo,
Lodun yii ni o goroyee baba e,
Bi ko si rubo,
Lodun yii ni o goroyee baba e.
Sabee loro,
Togun lofa,
Won o je sigun Ilobinrin,
Ki i mba won lo,
Mba mu pa,
Mba mu ta,
Mba mu rele lo sobinrin,
Dia fun itu,
Itu oko Ewure.
Oran bi oyi bi oyi
Dia fun agbo
Agbo oko ilaguntan.
Oran bi oyi bi oyi
Dia fun aparoyeye
Omo Oluoko.
Oran bi oyi bi oyi
Dia fun akereponju
Omo Agemon ba won lohun gbogbo, lohun gbogbo
Okan soso poro lobinrin dun mon lowo oko.
Bi won ba di meji ,
Won a dojowu.
Bi won ba di meta,
Won a deta ntule.
Bi won ba di merin
Won a di iwo lo rin mi ,ni mo rin o.
Bi won ba di marun,
Won a di lagbaja ,n lo run oko wa tan susuusu.
Bi won ba di mefa.
Won a di ika.
Bi won ba di meje,
Won a di aje
Bi won ba di mejo,
Won a di Iya alatari bamba
Loti ko iru eyi se oko wa lowo.
Bi won ba di mesaan,
Won a di Iyaale wa o nise kan,
Ko labo kan
Bo ba ti ji
Aso oko wa nii maaa san kiri.
Bi won ba di mewaa,
Won a di ile lokoo wa jooko,
Ni won nwa okoo waa wa.
Igba to di eleekini,
Mo lo ba won janpata lode Aro.
Won ke janpata janpata mo mi.
Won ke Oloyee mo mi.
Mo ni ki le n se lode Aro?
Won ni Iyawo lawon n gbe.
Mo ni e pele o.
Iyawo agberele,
Omo abilu,
Omo agboge lori oge
Iyawo o boosan,
Iyawo o boooro.
Iyawo o gboogbo Oluyeyentuye,
Iyawo o gbogbo Oluyeyentuye
Iyawo o gboogbo Oluogbo
Eyi to gbogbo gboo
To fi omo owu se onde sorun.
Omo owu yo yo di okini
Okini je ku bi iru esin.
Mo ni e je n koja .
Won ni n maa lo.
Mo de igbo je,
Mo de eluju je.
Mo ba iya arugbo kan jokujoku
O pewo isuko sowo otun
O pa tewura sosi
O pewo koko sarin.
O ni n waa je,
Mo lemi o gbodo je e.
Nigba eekeji,
Mo n lo ba won janpataa Lode Aro
Won nke Oloye Oloye mon mi.
Moni ki ni won n se lode Aro?
Won nii awon n joye ni.
Mo ni e pele oo..
Oye o gboogbo Oluyeyentuye,
Oye o gbogbo Oluyeyentuye,
Oye o gboogbo Oluogbo,
Eyi to gbo gboo gbo,
To fi omo ewu se olonde sorun
Omo ewu yo yo o di okini,
Okini je je ku bi iru esin.
Mo ni e je nkoja.
Won ni n ma lo
Mo de igbo je
Mo de Eluju je
Mo ba iya arugbo kan jokujoku.
O pewo isuko sowo otun,
O pa tewura sowo osi,
O pewo koko saarin.
O nii n waa je ,
Mo lemi o gbodo je e.
O mu owo epo,
O fi to mi leeke mi otun itorotoro,Itorotoro.
O mu owo epo
O fi to mi leeke mi osi itororo,itorotoro
Igba ti mo dele
Iya ni mo jehun lode.
Mo lemi o jehun
Iya loun o na mi
Moni eewo Orisa
Enikan ko gbodo na babalawo,
To ba gbo Ifa yanran yanran lotu ife yi.
Woni kini n o se?
Mo ni be yan ba na babalawo.
To gbofa yanranyanran lotu Ife yi,
Ohun buruku a ma ja lohun buruku,
Ohun buruku a si ma ja lohun buruku,
Egun ewon yo subu legun ata,
Ohun buruku a ma ja lura won
Paminpao ni pansa Ojumona n re luraa won.
Luminluo ni kengbe meji n lu ara won lona Odo.
Lonii ni parikokovo tenuu fundun wa,
Lonii ni parigidi o tenu bata jade.
Dia fun Orunmila.
Lojo ti won n paya iku nigbe loja Ejigbomekun.
Iku gbo
Iku han bii gate.
Iku merin se kese,
O fefon sokun fa,
O fakeke pa kese ija mese danindain.
Iku te ori ooro
Ooro gbiramu nle.
Iku te ori apa,
Apa gbiramu nle.
Iku te ori igba ,
Igba gbiramu nle
Iku te ori igi gbogbo
Igi gbogbo gbiramu nle
Igi Ayunre nikan loni ori ohun o gbo
O ni iku ti n poloja ti npalade,
Iku ti npa lookolooko,
Iku ti nponile ,ti npabuledo;
Bawo ni iku yi ko se ni pa ohun?
Ayunre mu eeji adibo
O mu eeta iteni,
O kori soko alawo,
Won ni ko ru eeku meji Oluwere,
Woni ko ru eja meji abiwegbada.
Woni ko ru obidiye meji abedo lukeluke,
Ewure meji abamu rederede,
Erinla meji to fiwo sosuka
Gbogbo re lo ru pata
Obinrin lodale
Ki eniyan o ma finu han fobinrin
Dia fun Olojongbodu
Obinrin iku
Won ji pe lowuro kutukutu,
Won ni kini iku okoo re, o gbodo je.
To fi n pa omo olomo kiri?
O ni kini won o fun oun?
Woni kilo fe ?
O ni oun o gba igba oke owo lowo won.
Igba to gba igba oke tan.
O ni iku oko ohum , ko gbodo je eku.
Won ni bo ba je eku nko?
O ni owo iku a ma wa irororo ,irororo.
O mi iku oko oun ko gbodo je eja.
Won ni ti iku ba je eja nko?
O ni ese iku a maa gbon iririri, iririri.
O ni iku oko ohun ko gbodo je eyim pepeye.
woni ti iku ba je eyin pepeye nko?
O ni iku a ma bi igororo,igororo
O ni iku oko oun ,ko gbodo je Elebute
Won ni ti iku ba je Elebute nko?
O ni gbogbo ara Iku a maa hu ibute
Won fun iku leku ,
Iku je eku tan ,
Gbogbo owo iku nwa irororo,irororo
Won fun Iku leja ,
Iku je eja tan,
Gbogbo ese iku n gbon iririri,iririri
Won fun Iku leyin pepeye,
Iku je eyin pepeye tan,
Iku nmbi igororo,igororo
Won fun iku lelebute
Iku jelebute tan,
Gbogbo ara iku nhu ibute,ibute
Iku te ori Ayunre,
Ayunre yeri bese.
Iku wa yo teere,
O wa fige sale
Iku waa yo teere,
O wa di gbiramu nle.
Iku wa fariwo ta saale saale.
Ifa orumila lo doyeye, mo lo di oyeye,
Ooto ni iku ye lori Awo
Oyeye.
Mo ti jawe Oluyeere o.
Oyeye iku ye lori awo
Oyeye
Translations
Ifa say,the soulof eldersis everlasting.
The water inside a movin canoe splashes about persistently.
The water inside a canoe splashes about,
It does not spill away
This were Ifa declarations for Oodua Atewonro Nife(one who descended from above through Iron chains to Ife)
He was told that if he perform ebo
(sacrifice),
That it was that year that he will ascend the throne of his father's,
And even if he did not observe the ebo (sacrifice)
It was still that same year that,he will ascend the throne of his fathers.
It is the people of Saabee that have poison.
It is the people of Togun that have arrows
If any of the two have lay seige on the city of women.
I would have follow them
I would have killed many,
I would have sold many to slavery
I would have taken some home as wives.
Matters that seem unstable as winds.
These were Ifa declarations gor he- goat,
The husband of goats.
Matter that seem unstable as wind.
These were Ifa declarations for Ram,
The husband of the sheep.
Matters that seem unstable as wind
This were ifa divination of feartherless bush fowl,
The offspring of the king of farmland.
Matter that seem unstable as wind,
Make ifa divination for Akereponju,
The offspring of Chamelion who always share out every thing.
IT IS ONE AND ONLY WIFE THAT BRING PLESURE TO A MAN.
When there are two wives,
They become a rivals.
When wives increase to three ,
They destroy the home.
When they increase to four,
They laugh and scorn one another.
When the wives increase to five,
They will accuse one of them of monopolizing their husband property.
When they increase to six ,
They will become a set of wicked people,
When wives increase to seven,
They become witches.
When they increase to eight,
They will say that it is the fat-headed favorite among them that has taught their husband his evil ways.
When they increase to nine
They will say the favorite among them have no work ,nor occupations,
Except to wake up in the mornings,
And wrap herself in their husband clothe arounds.
When the wives become ten ,
They will say even if their husband stay on his own at home,
Women still come out of their own volition to their husband.
On the first time
I went to engae in fierce contest in the city of Aro.
The people in Aro city were shouting at me
They are yelling at me .
I ask,what is it you are doing in the city of Aro?
They told me they were marrying wife.
Then , extended my greeting to them.
You will marry more wives.
You will bear more children.
You will marry many more maidens
The wife will beget many female children
The wife will beget many male children,
The wife will live to become old like Oluyeyentuye.
She will become old like Oluyenyentuye
She will be as old as Oluogno
Who was so old to the extentent
That he made anvil to make charm necklace
The anvil become old and worn out and it was reduce to the size of a needle.
The needle Size iron become old and worn out ,that it was reduce to the size of string of horse tails hair.
Then I pleaded , let me pass
They reply ,that I should continue my journey
On my way going ,I pass. through seven forest
I pass through seven wilderness.
I met one worn - out old woman
She put boilled crush yam on the right hand.
She put boiled crush water yam on the left hand
She invited me to eat
I declined totally.
On the second time
I went to engage in fierce contest with them in the city of Aro.
The peopl of Aro were shouting chief,cheif at me
They were yelling at me.
I demand, ' What are you doing' in the city of Aro' ?
They reply that ,they are having coronation ceremony of a cheif.
I said ,I extend my greeying to you.
The cheif will be as old ,as Oluyeyentuye
He will be as old as Oluyenyentuye
The cheif will be as old as Oluogbo,
Who was so old
That he use anvil to make charm necklace around his neck
The anvil became old ,and worn out,and have its size reduce to that of a needle.
The needle size iron ,become old and worn out and reduce to size of a string of horse tail's hair.
I then pleaded,'let me pass'
They said, I can contnue on my journey
I pass through seven forest
I pass through seven Wilderness
I met,one old worn-out woman
,
She put boiled-crushed yam in palm oilcon her right.
She placed boiled - crushed water yam on her left.
She put boiled - crushed cocoyam in the middle.
She invited me to eat.
I declined totally
She took her oily hand,
With it ,she made a tiny marks on my right cheek.
She took her oily hand ,
With it , she made a tiny mark on my left cheek
When I arrived home,
Mother accuse me ,of coming lhome late from my outing.
But i maintained,I did not.
Mother said she would beat me.
To which I answered her Eewo orisa (that is beating me is forbiden by the gods)
It is forbidden for any one to beat Babalawo
Who is very Verse in Ifa lithology in this city of Ife.
She demand ,what will be the consequence if she do
I replied her, Ifa a person beat a babalawo
Who is very verse in Ifa lithology in this city of Ife
Bad things will begin to fall from above on bad things, worse things will begging to fall from above on worse things
The sharp torns of Ewon plants will begging to fall on the sharp torn of Ata plants
One bad things will beging to fall after one another.
When the gourd hung over the fire place ,fall upon those beneath it ,it sound paminpao(that is kill me,and i kill you).
When gourds hit one another ,on their way to the stream ,they soun luminluo(that beat me,and I will beat you)
Dundun drum will be drum today as if it will sound no more
Bata drum, will be drum today to give sound as if today is its last day
Ifa declaration was make for orumila
On the day the Iya iku(Death's Mother) was been flogged at Ejigbomekun market.
When death heard this,
He cried out in anger,
Death make Elephant his horse's spur.
He made bufallo his rope
He made the Scorpion his tightly fixed spur,he is ready for battle
Death move to the peak of Ooro tree,
He pull down Ooro tree with enormous force.
He mount on Mahogany tree
He pulled down mahogany tree with brutal force
Death move to the top of locust bean tree
He pull down ,the locust bean tree with great force.
Death move to the top of variety of other trees,
Pulling them down with brutal force.
It is only Ayunre tree that was spared
It is the only tree that,claim his head is not ripe for fight.
He went make inquiries,'The death that kill celebrities and kings,
Death that kill people with great names,
Death that killl tge citizen as well as strangers,
How will this death not kill him?
Ayunre take the two cowries for the castings of ibo (ifa lots)
He also take three cowries to pay for diviner
He went to meet his diviners
He was advised to offer ebo with Eku meji Oluwere(two fast movong rat)
Eja meji abiwegbada(two fish that swim swiftly)
Two hen withvmature big livers
Two she -goat with protruding stomach
Two cows with big horns
He performed the ebo
WOMEN ARE LIARS
LET NO MAN OPEN HIS MIND TO WOMEN
This were Ifa declaration to Olojongbodu
The wife of Iku (death)
She was called early in the mornings
And she was asked ,what is it that her husband must not eat
That make it easy for him to kill other people children about.
She asked for what they will give yo hervin return for her to expose the secrets.
The said money
She said she will take 200 bags of cowries
After she had collected the money,
She said Iku(death) her husband must not eat Eku (rat)
They asked,'What will happen to iku ,if he eat rat'?
She said,'The hand of Iku will be shaking without stop'.
She said Iku ,her husband must not eat fish
They demand,'what will happen to Iku if he ate fish '?
She said,'The feet of iku will be shaking without stop.'
She said Iku, her husband must not eat Duck's egg
They asked, ' What will happen if Iku eat duck's egg?
She said ,'Iku will start to vomit without stop'
She said death,' her must not eat Elebute'
They asked, what will happen if he eat Elebute?
She said, Iku would become very weak.
They gave rat to Iku,
Death ate rats
Iku hands beging to shake without stop.
They gave fish to Iku
Iku ate fish
The feetof Iku started to shake without stops
They gave ducks's egg to Iku
Iku ate ducks's egg
He begin to vomit without stop.
They gave Elebute to Iku
Iku ate Elebute
He became extremely weak
When Iku climbed up the Ayunre tree
Ayunre tree simply move to one side
Iku suddenly slipped down,
Iku fell,with his chest on ground
Iku slipped suddenly,
And his fell made a loud noise,
He started to shout and riggle in pain
Ifa orunmila said, Oyeyeye I hail you
It is rock sure that Iku(death) have slipped Awo's head
Oyeye ,I hail you
I had pluck the leaves of Oluyeere tree
Oyeye ,I hail you.
Oyeye.
From the message of Odu Ifa Oyeku meji above as can read yourself. It is crystal clear that Ifa make her stand clear on different between monogamy and polygamy. This stanza, to be diplomatic in writing also depict the nature of women. Their dominant thought and emotion in times of temptation and crisis. The message in that above explain Odu is for the sage to decipher.
Polygamy.
Polygamy is the
practice or custom of having more than one wife or husband at the same time.
Ifa also approve polygamy for men, but not for women. There are many Ifa
stanaza where Ifa talk of blessing of many wives for people . In Odu Ifa
Ejiogbe . Ifa expressly predict the blessing of three wives for Orunmila. In that Odu Ifa says :
Okika ju je lewe
Mon ju je legbo
Dia fun Orunmila
Ifa n lo se oko Iboru
Okika ju je lewe
Mon ju je legbo
Dia fun Orunmila
Ifa n lo se oko Iboye
Okika ju je lewe
Mon ju je legbo
Dia fun Orunmila
Ifa n lo se oko Ibosise
Ebo ni won ni ko
se
O si gbo ebo neb o rubo
Ko pe kojina
E wa bani ni wowo
ire gbogbo
Translation
The leaves of
Okika is good for consumption
But it roots is
not good for consumsption
This was Ifa’s
message for Orunmila
When he is going
to become husband of Iboru
The leaves of
Okika is good for consumption
But its roots is
not good for consumption
This was Ifa’s
message for Orunmila
When he is going
to become husband of Iboye
The leaves of
Okika is good for consumption
But its roots is
not good for consumsption
This was Ifa’s
message for Orunmila
When he is going
to become husband of Ibosise
He was advised to
offer ebo
He complied
Not to long ,not
too far come and meet in the midst of Ire.
From the extract
of Ejiogbe above we can see where Ifa approve three wives and even deem it as a
blessing.
Also in Odu Ifa
Odi meji. We can see where Ifa help an individual to secure the blessing of two
wives. A man who have previously have no
wifes beget two wives and Ifa deem it as
a blessing to him. On this, Odu Ifa Odi meji says:
Oro to ba dun Babalawo ni dun Ifa
Oro to ba dun
Onisegun ni dun Osanyin
Oro to ba dun Aje ni
dun Oso idi re
Dia funeji odi
Baba n sukun alai
ni obirin
Ebo ni won ni ko
se
O si gbo ebo neb o
rubo
Igba to yo fee
O fe Elewa
O tun fe apeere omo oba se aya
Ero ipo
Ero ofa
E wa bani ni wowo
ire gbogbo
Translation
It is whatever a
source of concern for Babalwo that concern Ifa
It is whatever a
source of concern for Onisegun that concern Osanyin
It is whatever a
source of concern for Aje (witches) that concern source of spiritual power
This was Ifa’s
message for Eji odi
When he was
lamenting for lack of wife
He was advised to
offer ebo
He complied
When he was about
to marry
He marry Elewa (
damsel)
He also get marry
to Apeere(daughter of a king)
People of Ipo
People of Ofa
Meet us in the midst
of plenty blessing
Type of marriage
that are not acceptable in African Ifa and Orisa spirituality
There are certain
form of marriage that is not acceptable in African Ifa and Orisa spirituality.
The identifiable one are :
Polyandry – : the state or
practice of having more than one husband or male mate at one time. In Africa Ifa
tradition this is forbidden. As woman can only have one husband at a time . A
leading Odu Ifa for this is Owonri Ofun
where Ifa says :
Sonso
ori omu obinrin ko gun ni loju
Aya
obinrin ko gba eniyan meji sisun
Dia
fun Ogun ti yo lo fe Alayaki Omo Orisa
Sonso
ori omu obinrin ko gun ni loju
Aya
obinrin ko gba eniyan meji sisun
Dia
fun Orisa oko agba Irawo ti yo lo fe Alayaki Omo Orisa
Sonso
ori omu obinrin ko gun ni loju
Aya
obinrin ko gba eniyan meji sisun
Dia
fun Orunmila ti yo lo fe Alayaki Omo
Orisa
Ebo
ni won ni ki won se
Orunmila
nikan lo tubo
Enyan
meta o je duro ni meji-meji
Orunmia
nikan ni Orisa fi omo fun
Translation
The pointed nipple
of a woman cannot pierce the eye
The chest of one
woman is not broad enough for two people to sleep on it
This was ifa ‘s
message to Ogun when he going to seek the hand of Alayaki daughter of Orisa in marriage
The pointed nipple
of a woman cannot pierce the eye
The chest of one
woman is not broad enough for two people to sleep on it
This was ifa ‘s
message to Orisa oko when he going to seek the hand of Alayaki daughter of
Orisa in marriage
The pointed nipple
of a woman cannot pierce the eye
The chest of one
woman is not broad enough for two people to sleep on it
This was ifa ‘s
message to Orunmila when he going to seek the hand of Alayaki daughter of Orisa
in marriage
They were advised
to offer ebo
It is only
Orunmila that complied
Three people cannot
stand two-two
It is only
Orunmila that Orisa give his daughter to.
Gay marriage or
lesbian
The sexual orientation approved in IFA
spirituality and Yoruba cultural believes is HETEROSEXUAL :that is sexual
attractions between man and woman. Ifa forbid sexual relationship between man
and man or female and fellow female sexual relationship. So any sexual
orientation expect heterosexuality is not approve in IFA. The foremost
authority in IFA on sexual orientation is odu ifa OFUN IRETE also known
as OFUN alaaye. Ifa said
Ireke dun ju esisun
Epo se je isu
Isu se je epo
Akaso lo dun gun Aka
Obinrin dun basun ju Okunrin lo
Okunrin dun basun ju Obinrin lo
Bokunrin ba Okunrin sun
Bi kooko bi oowo
Bi iku bi agbarin
Bi obirin ba Obinrin sun
Bi erofo, Bi eri
Bokunrin ba Obinrin sun
Bi obirin ba Okunrin sun
Bi Eni fola yun pun
Bi Eni fola yun Ra
Igi OFUN rete lo ro gangan mon olele
Difa fun apon ako
Ti yi olo fi olele omo olofa se aya
Apon pe olele, olele o je oo
Ko ju ohun ti ifa se lo
Apon pe olele, olele o je
Ko ju ohun ti Ebora n se lo.
Translation
Sugar cane is more sweet than elephant grass
Palm oil is a good supplement to eat yam
Yam is a good supplement to eat palm oil
A ladder is a good instrument to climb rafter
It is sweet and better for a man to have sexual Intercourse with a woman than her fellow man
It is better for a woman too to have sexual relationship with man than her female counterpart
If a man have sex with her fellow man
The resultant effects will be lumps, boils and yam.
If a woman also have sex with her fellow woman
The resultant effects will be murk, stinking odour, filth and irritation.
If a man have sex with a woman
If also woman have sex with a man
The resultant effective is indescribable hedonistic pleasure
The feeling derived is unquantifiable enjoyment
OFUN irete sex organ was strong and turgid
Ifa divination reading was performed for a chronic bachelor
On the day he was going to seek olele, the daughter of olofa hand in marriage
The chronic bachelor called on her but she didn't respond
The problem is not more than ifa can resolve
The chronic bachelor call on her she doesn't respond the problems is not more than what the ancestors can resolve.
From this odu ifa we can see that the only approve sexual relationship in IFA is heterosexuality. There are others odu ifa wish speak on lesbianism .
Endogamy -the custom of
marrying only within the limits of a local community, clan, or tribe. Where such
is allow . It is repugnant to Ifa practice . for example Odu Ifa ejiogbe says:
Ise isekise
Iwa ihukuhu
Ni mu won se ohun
ti won o le so
Dia fun Otooto
eniyan
Ti yoo bi omo
obinrin kan
Ti yoo fi se
obirin
E wi funlara wipe ohu ise
Ew funAjero wipe
ohu sise
E wi fun Ora gu
ile ial wipe ohu si se
Translation
The act of
misconduct
And their act of misbehavior
That is what make
them to do what they dare not say
This was Ifa’s
message for Otooto eniyan
Who had only one daughter
And chose to make
her as wife
Please tell Alara
that I have misbehaved
Please tell Ajero
that I have misbehave.
Culled from Babalawo Obanifa unpublished work
(African Ifa theology) You will access the continuation of this work in
Babalawo obanifa unpublished work (African Ifa theology)
Copyright :Babalawo
Pele Obasa Obanifa, phone and whatsapp contact :+2348166343145, location Ile
Ife osun state Nigeria.
IMPORTANT NOTICE :
As regards the article above, all rights reserved, no part of this article may
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mechanical including photocopying and recording or by any information storage
or retrieval system without prior written permission From the copyright holder
and the author Babalawo Obanifa, doing so is considered unlawful and will attract
legal consequences
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